Forget Hoi An!

Everyone has to go to Hoi An. An old town, a historic ensemble, carefully renovated. A UNESCO World Heritage Site and proclaimed the highlight of every visit to Vietnam by every travel guide without exception. Today I arrive in Hoi An and need a whole two hours to develop a completely different opinion: Hoi An is the most pathetic world heritage site I have ever visited.

Just counted: I’ve visited 18 UNESCO sites so far on this trip around the world. Since last year, my home town of Regensburg has also been a World Heritage Site. The sites are selected on the basis of their outstanding historical significance in conjunction with actual history. That’s exactly why I’m shouting to the world: Forget Hoi An!

The city is actually quite nice. 70.000 inhabitants, not too big. Hoi An was one of the most important trading harbours in Southeast Asia in the last few centuries. There are still numerous old trading houses. Hoi An was put on the list mainly because of them.

And why doesn’t Hoi An belong there? Firstly, the oldest buildings are just 200 years old. Well, in a country where blood is spilled every minute and unexploded bombs can be found every three metres, that’s pretty old. Accepted. Some of the buildings are very dilapidated, some are not even looked after.

The travel guides claim that Hoi An is a beautiful ensemble because of the careful renovation and expansion of the city. Renovation perhaps, but not expansion. Right next to the old town, pastel-coloured concrete bunkers stand side by side. Apart from the centre, the urban structure is almost as successful as Neutraubling. In other words: completely non-existent, simply shit.

How does Vietnam look after its world cultural heritage? First of all, admission to the city costs three euros. No joke and unique in the world. I don’t understand it and just run past the ticket booth a few times. There are building sites everywhere, the city is being expanded in a brutal and oversized way. Dirt, rubbish and a car-free old town. Forget Hoi An!

Completely? No…there’s always something else. Hoi An has been famous for centuries for its silk, tailors and shoemakers. There are more than 500 shops where you can get any style tailored to your body within 2 hours. I try it out and quickly design a shirt that is not available off the peg. In the evening, fine, heavy black silk nestles around me. Enthusiasm. And for 12 euros, the same again in white, please.

A Vietnamese man has returned to Hoi An after 15 years of travelling and cooking around the world. He works his magic in the Mango Room. My salivary glands cramp in three gigantically delicious courses. After a final cocktail, I head back to the hotel. My room: marble bathroom, TV, AC, two huge double beds, WiFi. Maybe I’ll manage to spend more than 700 euros within a month after all. The final spurt has begun.