Freedom to the nudists!

It’s time for another verbal broadside. My target group today: make a nudist. Actually, I have nothing against nudists. I think the principle of live and let live is great, and freedom anyway. The reason for today’s attack is the fact that there are an alarming number of very covered and uptight antibodies among nudists.

The antibodies are characterised by an inspection sticker for mental freedom issued by the Thai TÜV. They are naked out of narrow-mindedness. They despise classic nudist ideas such as “In a healthy body lives a healthy mind.” Maybe that’s why the antibodies are so narrow-minded.

I’ve been living in the nudist camp for a week now. I didn’t choose to be invited here, but I gladly accepted. Times have become more difficult for nudists. On the left, the restaurant no longer wants to tolerate naked people in front of the terrace. Their living space is disappearing. There is a generally tense state of siege, which erupts in some bizarre scenes.

The first thing that comes to mind is the saying of the self-appointed nudist block warden, who literally mocked a friend’s swimming trunks during my first visit a few years ago: “Excuse me, I’m irritated by your wearing clothes. Please take them off.”

Yes, this is a nudist camp. Yes, you should be naked here. No, you shouldn’t demand it. After all, when the naked people in Munich are lying around on the Isar, I don’t run there and grumble that I’m bothered by the sight of a nudist’s bum. I don’t care. You can get naked wherever you want. And if I keep my swimming trunks on at the nudist beach until I come back out to kite, I demand the same acceptance.

What does nudism mean? Is it freedom? My mum let me play naked as a child. Does that make me unfree because I don’t have to express my freedom through nudity? No! I accept the fact that some people see it as freedom to walk around the world naked. And I demand acceptance for my freedom shorts! No matter where!

Rules are very important to antibodies. Instead of showing each other natural, honest respect, they set up a whole host of laws that form something like the lowest common denominator of truthfulness. The antibodies are not the first. In 2001, Bush called it the Patriot Act. Okay, he wasn’t naked, but he was just as mentally limited.

Now, when the dear naked free spirits feel that their rules have been violated, they drop their masks. Then you really learn something about respect and freedom. You are only allowed to drive to the camp by car to load and unload on the day of arrival and departure. I went shopping, filled my car boot to the brim and slowly drove to the camp to unload in the middle of my holiday.

Of course, a free spirit saw it straight away. Inspected exactly what I was unloading. He vehemently pointed out my misbehaviour. He lectured me loudly with a quarter-hour ode to his own intellectual freedom. “I don’t care, but…”. I close my eyes tightly, let the drivel wash over me and demand: Freedom to the nudists!