Wikingair @ Secret Kite Camp

My great-grandfather on my mother’s side was Danish. He brewed beer, somewhere in the south. I don’t know where. I don’t even know what his name was. I don’t speak a word of Danish. But the funny Danish Captain Kim speaks English. He invites me to spend four days preparing his Secret Kite Camp AmazingPhilippines.dk at the end of the world. I gratefully accept.

The two-hour crossing from Coron is an adventure. For me. Captain Kim calls the two-metre swell on his eight-metre speedboat “comfortable” from the second half onwards. The hard blows after high waves make me prefer to shoulder the laptop standing up in the waterproof bag. Out of my warm life hands. After two hours, quite well showered, we land in the Caribbean-turquoise shallow water channel between the islands of Nangalao and Secret Island.

We are as far away from everything as possible, right in the middle between Coron and Palawan. I tuck tail for the moment. Amihan, which is already blowing mightily, is further accelerated in the 750 metre wide shallow water between the two islands by 200 metre high hills on both sides. It churns along quite stubbornly at 24 to 32 knots over the one square kilometre standing area. As the wind is always whistling over the hilly eastern tip of Nangalao, it is a little bit stubborn.

With the sunset approaching, Captain Kim announces the last session of the day in a wind that refuses to die down. I’m scared. My 10 Core XR promises limitless riding. But in all gusts it is once again the most good-natured of all imaginable flying machines. The ground wind demands every last bit of depower. But the Core is always nailed to the sky. After grooving in for a while, I give the adjuster some sugar.

In the not-so-smooth water between the islands at high tide, it pulls me up for a good hour. Not because of the technique. Simply because I’m permanently overpowered by small kicker waves until the sun goes down. I would have liked to know how high I got. But without an internet connection, the Woo app refuses to provide any information. What’s this rubbish, you WooDiots? What’s the point of an app that obliges you to be online and publicly announce your performance? I want to be able to check my performance without the internet and just for myself!

I’m very grateful to the dozen Danish guests for not constantly switching languages for the only person who speaks a different language. Germany has started and lost two wars. But when the hotel checkers Ina and Nina have once again successfully hypnotised me, it sometimes seems to me that tourism is our greatest and most long-term shame.

With a large bottle of tanduhay, I take part in all the games of the nightly Viking Olympics. I lose two rounds of poker, win a four, play a tie-breaking game of chess and win at darts. With the young Viking David, I briefly consider going kiteboarding in the immnoch brezelnden Hackwind far beyond midnight. But even madness knows its limits. I fall safely into bed in my little hut right on the beach.

Almost everyone leaves in the morning. Robinson watches the kite odyssey from the loneliest island. At low tide you can walk almost dry-shod to the neighbouring island of Nangalao. You have to go out a good distance to kite. Neoprene shoes are advisable. There are some small but quite sharp stones in the shallow water. Apart from the occasional take-off in the gusts during take-off and landing, they are the only danger at this magical kitespot. I’m only halfway ready to go again in the late afternoon at high tide.

At high tide, the small wind waves from upwind with a mild 30 cm always come in as small kickers thanks to the C-shape, regardless of which direction the Amihan is coming from. It’s not so easy to find them. Depending on the tide, their positions change quite widely. But once you’ve found them, you’re in Viking heaven. And if you catch one right in the gust, you’ll jump the Vikingair. Failed landings can sometimes be a bit hard with only 30 cm of water. But everyone has long since died in heaven anyway. Or have they?

The next morning, Captain Kim scratches me out of bed far too early. He wants to show me the other side. The other side is the low tide. You can now get 750 metres across to the neighbouring island of Nangalao almost without getting wet. To kite, you now have to walk 150 metres to leeward. Behind the sandbank between the two islands there is now a mirror-smooth trick laboratory par excellence. The wind is chopping at 27 to 35 knots.

A Swiss man from the catamaran Soniya, which has just anchored, messes up a jump at full throttle. His board almost flies into my face while I’m filming. He needs a rib massage afterwards. I’m incredibly happy that my jumps in the crystal-clear lagoons, which are no more than 20 cm deep, all went well in the slightly earlier incoming tide. The motivation to land there cleanly may have been slightly increased.

In the evening, we go out for another tide session. I head out to the reef waves 300 metres upwind for the first time. They break over hard ground up to one and a half metres high. The outer reef waves also follow a C. No matter which way the wind is blowing, there is always a spot for massive kickers or a line where you can ride the waves cleanly for a few dozen metres. As is almost always the case with reef waves, there is no room for painless falls.

Captain Kareem invites me to visit his 15-metre catamaran Soniya, which is currently at anchor, for an excellent dinner. He bemoans the fact that the new kite camp on Liwagao has poached his many years of experience as a chef. Kareem charges €180 all inclusive per night and person on his luxurious catamaran. On Liwagao they charge €200 per night. That’s the price for the most expensive air mattress dormitory in the Philippines – and unfortunately also a good cook. If you fancy individual luxury catamaran kite trips in the Philippines, here is Kareem’s contact information: 63 921 4654 757 #FreedomKitesurfingPhilippines. Tours can be booked for three days or more.

The evening is spent watching kitesurfing videos with Meier and lots of Tanduhay. None of these videos can be found on YouTube. But the minimalism and the clear cuts to the best sounds of DJs from Ibiza are the best I’ve ever seen in 20 years of editing. Have you seen the YouTube video in which a kiter dangles from the kite on a line behind the boat? I’m afraid Kareem invented it. Others made the money. Thanks for the landing and the great food, Kareem! I fall into bed under twinkling stars and a glittering horizontal Christmas tree strung with shells.

My last day on Secret Island is dedicated to relaxation. Everything hurts from numerous heavy impacts after BigAirs. In the evening, during the last kite session, a hellish headache leads to three backstall / safety aborts during take-off and landing. The wind drops to a patchy 18 knots for the first time in four days. I’m through. Packing the equipment. One last supper. During the night, the supposed hangover turns out to be a virus with a severe fever, nausea and even more headaches.

The next day, Captain Kim takes me back to Coron by speedboat. The wind on Secret Island, with Bislig Beach after Pagudpud, is the strongest in the Philippines. For four days, the basic wind was between 24 and 30 knots with gusts of plus five.

In Coron, thanks to the Internet, the Woo announces my new best performance of 10.7 m Wikingair with over 150 jumps totalling 600 metres in altitude. Full of gratitude, my knees buckle in front of the bed in Coron. After finding out that yet another Filipino couldn’t get anything done. The tourist information centre failed to book my ticket to Mindoro within four days. Sold out. The next available boat leaves in six days.

Secret Island Kitespot Pro

• Robinson Island at the end of the world, uninhabited except for the camp. Absolute tranquillity.
• 1 km² large Caribbean-turquoise standing area
• One stop kite shop. Laboratory flat water, lagoons, waves and foilable depths depending on the tide right on the doorstep.
• No obstacles
• Endless space
• Strong sideshore winds, a little bumpy
• 30 metres from the bed to the board
• Friendly owners and staff
• Rental equipment and kite training available
• Kite and board storage included

Secret Island Kitespot Contra

• Due to the remote location in the middle between Coron and Palawan, the speedboat consumes a whopping 50 litres of super on every trip from/to Coron. This is rightly reflected in the prices.
• The crossing can be rough and humid.
• No telephone or internet. Generator power only in the restaurant.
• Shower water from the spring is a little salty from time to time. Should be fixed from 2020 thanks to desalination plant.
• Some small sharp stones in the standing area. Neoprene shoes are advisable.
• I was missing deckchairs / cosy lounge chairs. Should be coming soon.